55 Calculus Pick Up Lines That Differentiate You

Roses are red, Functions can be complex, Your beauty's continuous, On every vertex.

Call me a definite integral, because I want to be the area beneath your curves.

Your love is like an improper integral - it goes on forever.

Are you a vector field? Because you've got me feeling curl and divergence all at once.

Let's be like nested functions - I want to get inside you.

Your beauty is like a power series - it converges to perfection.

Call me epsilon, because I want to get arbitrarily close to you.

I'd like to be the asymptote to your hyperbola - always approaching, never touching.

Your eyes are like local maxima - I can't help but get lost in them.

Want to do some implicit differentiation? I'll solve for y if you solve for x.

You must be the square root of -1, because you're the imaginary unit of my dreams.

Let's skip the small talk and jump straight to L'Hôpital's rule - I want to know your true form.

Are you a continuous function? Because I'd love to explore every inch of your domain.

Your beauty is like a discontinuous function - simply undefined.

Let's skip the small talk and go straight to the point of inflection.

Let's find our common denominator and see if we can reduce to lowest terms.

I must be your second derivative, because I'm always thinking about your curves.

Are you a polar curve? Because you've got me revolving around you.

Are you the integral of 1/x? Because you've got me feeling natural, logarithmically.

Your beauty is like a Taylor series - it can be expanded infinitely.

I wish I was your derivative, so I could lie tangent to your curves.

Call me the chain rule, because I'd love to differentiate you.

Are you a definite integral? Because you've got some fine upper and lower bounds.

I must be approaching your limit, because I'm feeling a strong attraction.

Your smile is like the graph of ex - it's always positive and growing.

Let's find the area under these sheets - no need for integration by parts.

I must be your square root, because I feel irrational around you.

Are you a Laurent series? Because you've got me feeling singularly attracted.

Roses are red, Taylor series expand, Your smile's infinite, Like grains of sand.

Roses are red, Derivatives are slick, Your curves are so smooth, They make my heart tick.

Roses are red, L'Hôpital's rule is neat, Finding your true form, Would be quite a feat.

Roses are red, Asymptotes never touch, But unlike those lines, I want you so much.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wish I was secant, So I could intersect you.

Roses are red, Local maxima peak, Your eyes are the summit, That make my knees weak.

Roses are red, Polar curves spin, Your radial beauty, Makes my head swim.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Let's find critical points, Between me and you.

Roses are red, Improper integrals extend, My love for you diverges, It will never end.

Roses are red, Inflection points bend, You've changed my direction, Will you be my friend?

Roses are red, Epsilon's small but true, I want to get closer, Infinitely, to you.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're the solution, To my differential, too.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Let's find the limit, As I approach you.

Roses are red, Integrals are fine, I'll gladly be the area, Under your curve line.

Your beauty oscillates like a sine wave - endlessly captivating.

Are you a piecewise function? Because you've got all the right parts in all the right places.

Let's be like parallel tangent lines - our slopes perfectly matched.

Your beauty is non-differentiable - it has infinite sharp points that leave me breathless.

Are you the Fundamental Theorem of Calculus? Because you bring my world together.

I'd love to find the volume of revolution around your axis.

Call me a local extremum, because I can't get any higher than when I'm with you.

Let's integrate our love from negative infinity to positive infinity.

Your curves are so fine, they make Gaussian distributions jealous.

Are you a Riemann sum? Because you're the closest approximation to perfection I've ever seen.

I wish I was your antiderivative, so I could be the area under your curves.

Let's find the critical points in our relationship - I have a feeling they'll all be maxima.

Are you a complex function? Because you've got me feeling real and imaginary.